A Precarious Balance

Modern Times By Abhay Mangaldas
A Precarious Balance
'Hey Vish, do you find that, consciously or subconciously, you are always seeking a balance in everything that you do in life!
I guess that's how most of us perceive things! Who doesn't want live life on an even keel?
You end up dividing life into different compartments, don't you? There is work, relationships…with spouse (when there is one!), family…then there is health…. emotional, intellectual and spiritual growth… and your present state of mind is based on how you are faring in all of the above, right? But you invariably find something missing in one or the other.
…. and your focus is always on that missing aspect, isn't that what you are trying to say? Like an exam where you even though you may get a distinction in all the subjects, if you fail in one you still repeat the year!
Well, that may not be an appropriate analogy as it is probably important to recognise your weaknesses and make a conscious effort in improving on them, however good you may be in other areas! Would you not be fooling yourself if you try and hide you failings under the carpet of your achievements? What I meant was that you rarely savor the gift of life… this in spite knowing that in reality, if you only focussed on evolution of the self, the rest would automatically fall in place!
Well, as they say, all you need to change the world is to change your attitude, right?
Easier said than done. Try and remember the last time you felt that 'if I died at this moment, I'd be a happy person'!
Let me think….
Not to say that you never do, but most of the time, you are either brooding about something in the past or in anxiety of the future…and seldom in the present moment! Unfortunately, even after you realise this, the moments keep passing by…. !
Ah! The pleasure of life is in the journey and not the destination…. it's the means and not the end that really matters…?! Is that your drift?
Pretty much! That's why I like the saying 'take life by its horns'…it's nice to compare life to a raging bull of pulsating energy…with the reigns in our hands. Imagine! We have the power to channel this awesome energy in to whatever we chose to… without ever losing the excitement of the ride!
And all we end up doing is to keep looking back or looking in front and forget that the bull is right under you! No wonder we get thrown off along the wayside!
Reminds me of the three categories of people who make up this world. Those who make things happen, those who watch things happen and those who wonder what happened!
Bhrahm! Now how is that relevant to the subject of maintaining balance?
That we worry more about how other people think of us…a major reason why we look ahead or behind and not under. We shape our reality based on a perception of how others see it. Heck! How many times have you stopped yourself from doing something that you'd really love to, only because it would be perceived to be inappropriate… or, on the other hand, doing something that you really didn't want to, but did it only because you were expected to? We rarely take out time to get to know ourselves, so busy are we in flowing with the tide! No wonder our identity, for most part, remains a blur…like a moving reflection in a funny mirror!
So, till we don't recognise and accept who we really are, we can't enjoy the proverbial bull ride?!
… and our life remains in a suspended animation… a perpetual state of trying to stop from tilling over…a precarious balance in search of an equilibrium.